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Spring Cleanup Special: Out with the Old Poop, in with the New 

Scoop delivers the Straight Poop from Bend, Ore.

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Monday, March 19

Bringing the crazy: Gunman attacks Jewish school in Toulouse, France, killing rabbi and three children ... Lawyer for Sgt. Robert Bales, held in slaying of 16 Afghani civilians including nine children, says Bales "has no memory" of the event ... Lynndie England, former soldier convicted in Abu Ghraib prison scandal, says she's not sorry for abusing prisoners. "It's like saying sorry to the enemy," she says ... Unusual candor: On campaign trail in Illinois, Rick Santorum says, "I don't care what the unemployment rate's going to be. Doesn't matter to me" ... Have Bible, will travel: Peyton Manning signs with Denver Broncos; team looking to trade quarterback Tim Tebow ... Fame has its ups and downs: Director James Cameron of "Titanic" and "Avatar" fame unveils new submersible device, plans to dive to deepest point in ocean, almost seven miles down ... Ashton Kutcher of "Two and a Half Men" books $200,000 trip into space aboard Virgin Galactic rocket plane.

Tuesday, March 20

Hunt for justice: Hundreds of French police join manhunt for slayer of rabbi and three children; police say he also killed three soldiers last week ... Florida state attorney asking grand jury to probe death of Trayvon Martin, African-American teen gunned down by Neighborhood Watch volunteer; FBI, Justice Department also investigating ... Bombs away: Disney says "John Carter" expected to lose $200 million, making it one of biggest box office disasters ever ... We are not amused: White House says Robert DeNiro's joke at fundraiser about US not being ready for "a white first lady" was "inappropriate" ... Unfortunate situation: Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino of "Jersey Shore" checks into rehab for prescription med addiction.

Wednesday, March 21

Looking sketchy: Mitt Romney struggles to "clarify" aide's remark that for him changing positions is as easy as erasing an Etch-a-Sketch ... Meanwhile he picks up coveted endorsement of former Florida Gov. Jeb Bush ... Under siege: Suspect in French slayings, identified as Mohammed Merah, 24, holed up in house in Toulouse surrounded by hundreds of cops ... Hoodies unite! Family of Trayvon Martin joins "Million Hoodie March" in NYC to protest lack of police action in Martin's slaying ... Start of "American Spring"? Occupy Wall Street demonstrators converge on park in NY; several arrested ... The price of fame: Wife of Jason Russell, director of "Kony 2012" video, who was hospitalized after running around naked and masturbating in public, says he suffers from "reactive psychosis."

Thursday, March 22

Justice done, justice delayed: Mohammed Merah, suspect in slayings of rabbi and three children and three soldiers, shot in head by police after leaping from window ... US raises death toll in Afghan civilian massacre to 17; Staff Sgt. Robert Bales to be charged with 17 counts of murder, six counts of attempted murder ... Thousands attend rally in Florida for slain teenager Trayvon Martin; suspected killer George Zimmerman claiming self-defense ... Green shoots: Number of new applications for unemployment benefits in US falls to four-year low; Index of Leading Economic Indicators highest since June 2008 ... Fast-tracking: Under attack for rising gas prices, Obama orders speedy approval process for controversial Keystone XL pipeline ... Overdoing it: Coroner says Whitney Houston drowned in hotel bathtub, possibly as result of cocaine use and heart disease; marijuana, Xanax, Benadryl and other meds also found in her system.

Friday, March 23

Wear a sweatshirt, get shot? Geraldo Rivera of Faux News says it was Trayvon Martin's fault he got killed because he wore a hoodie ... Can we consider this an endorsement? Rick Santorum says Republicans "might as well" vote for Obama if Mitt Romney gets Republican nomination ... Tain't funny: Secret Service investigating woman who shouted "Pretend it's Obama!" at Louisiana campaign event where Santorum was shooting a pistol at a target. Santorum says he didn't hear her ... Spies among us: Associated Press investigation finds NY police infiltrated liberal groups, kept dossiers on activists ... Flour-bombed! Kim Kardashian hit with plastic bag full of flour at London hotel; she doesn't press charges.

Saturday, March 24

Big win on the bayou: Rick Santorum sweeps Louisiana GOP primary, beating Romney by more than 22 points ... Incredibly, he DID have a heart before: Former Vice President Dick Cheney, 71, gets heart transplant ... Family pride: Abdelkader Merah, older brother of terrorist who killed Jewish school children, tells French police he's "proud" of what his brother did ... Not a happy time: Kazakhstan outraged over playing of fake national anthem from movie "Borat" at Arab sports event, demands investigation ... Wages of sin: Former Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi, 75, buys 30-room mansion on Italy's Lake Como; bunga-bunga parties presumably planned.

Sunday, March 25

Weighing in for the defense: Larry Pratt, head of Gun Owners of America, says Trayvon Martin was "assailant" and "should have run away" from George Zimmerman ... Meanwhile, black friend of Zimmerman's says he's not a racist and "cried for days" after shooting ... Descent into barbarism: Iraqi immigrant Shaima Alawadi, 32, dies from injuries suffered in beating in her El Cajon, CA home Saturday; note at scene said "go back to your own country" ... Fun with numbers: Rick Santorum says "bad math" makes Romney's delegate lead look more impressive than it is ... He's back, maybe: Tiger Woods wins Arnold Palmer Invitational, his first PGA Tour victory since 2009 ... Bonanza: "Hunger Games" grosses $155 million in first weekend, besting all movies except the last "Harry Potter" and "The Dark Knight."


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