Are you the smartest, funniest and most articulate of your friends? Prove it, by renaming Caldera Grill.
The downtown bar is changing its name, but apparently are feeling uninspired so they're requesting some help form you!
Look for this ad in this week's the Source...
Fill in your answer and submit to the bar at 932 NW Bond St.
Submissions should be three worlds, naughty and stupid entries need not apply.
We would give you some examples but we couldn't think of any that weren't naughty or stupid.
The beloved dancing pizza saleswoman who boogies daily at the corner of Third St. and Reed Market has more Facebook 'likes' than the Source Weekly.
With 5,458 likes the Little Caesars Lady has double the likes of "Old Mill District Rock Chucks" (with an impressive 2,412 likes), and nearly five times as many likes as the "Bend Elks Baseball Club" (1,162 likes).
We're good sports so we want to offer our congratulations to Little Caesars Lady, we salute you!
But if you do have a moment, Source readers, perhaps like our Facebook so we can compete. Like here! Thanks!
This week, our favorite I Luv TV columnist, Wm.™ Steven Humphrey, reminds us that next week is the best week of all the weeks, it's Shark Week!
He also reminds us that the only thing cooler than a week of sharks is a tornado full of them. Here's the trailer for the SyFy commissioned B-horror-flick that Humphrey is referencing, SHARKNADO! Watch it, and read his column online or in the Source on Wednesday.
What have we learned? Los Angeles isn't exempt from having sharks hurled at them by nature, and the Discovery Channel should just give up because this is the best film made about flying sharks to date. Also, Tara Reid is still alive!
Our music editor Ethan Maffey is famous! He and his wedding party are the front page of the Goorin Bros. Hat Shop webpage!
Angela Raines, our cover artist for next week's paper happens to work at Goorin Bros. on 23rd St. in Portland. What a coincidence! Here is one of her bunny-centric pieces called "Blue Magician."
Now 45, the comedic actor grew up around laughter. His mother Mitzi Shore founded The Comedy Store in Hollywood and his father Sammy was a comedian himself. Because of that lineage, Shore knew early on that he wanted to pursue comedy. In one form or another that's exactly what he's done.
And he's bringing those talents to Bend's Tower Theatre this Wednesday night. (see info below)
The Source caught up with the comedian by phone Sunday night, finding Shore a bit tired. Though, in between yawns he did manage to 'make up his melon' enough to show flashes of his more alert self, even apologizing for being a bit out of it since he's not used to being "on" during a Sunday evening.
The result was an eclectic conversation covering everything from NSA surveillence, Chris Christie, Kim Kardashian, Justin Beiber, gun violence and the new Miss U.S.A.. Check it out below.
SW: Were you watching the Spurs/Heat game?
I was.
SW: Which team are you rooting for?
What the fuck dude! That’s like asking me if I’m a Republican or a Democrat! I’m not going to answer that and alienate half of my fans!
SW: Ha! No problem man. So, I wanted to talk politics with you a bit. Your Pauly-tics special took that arena head on with comedy. Did you come out of that experience feeling better or worse about government?
More entertained by them. I don’t’ want to say the word scam, but it’s all show business you know what I mean? The thing is to me, a lot of reasons why these people run, yeah they believe in what they say, but at the end of the day they just want the plaque on their desk with their name on it and to eat at Outback Steakhouse without paying for it.
SW: Are you following this whole NSA thing where they're collecting phone records from Americans?
I think the whole thing is pretty disgusting. I also think this whole the gun thing is an issue, with these automatic crazy Rambo type weapons. Those should definitely be banned. But my belief is guns don't kill people, people kill people. At the end of the day we really need to spend time determining who’s crazy out there. If someone is locking themselves in their basement for weird hours or sitting in back of the classroom scratching their face trying to pick a scab all the time that’s someone you should watch. Or if someone isn't getting any vagina, those are people you need to watch.
SW: So what is the NSA learning about Pauly Shore by reading his emails and spying on his phone calls?
That I like vagina bro! Yeeeeeeee! That’s the good part about me no secrets!
SW: I know you once performed at the Gathering of the Juggalos for Insane Clown Posse. Those guys are in a pretty heated battle with the F.B.I. right now over their gang designation. Do you have any advice for them?
No comment dude. I know some good Jewish lawyers in Beverly Hills. They’d be really expensive. Maybe move to Thailand?
SW: Who do you hope runs for President in 2016?
Chris Christie, the chubby guy from Jersey. I’m just kidding. He'll probably run though, I’m sure. If he lost some weight. He’s probably the only Republican I see being tangible at all.
SW: Switching gears here, yesterday Twitter went crazy over the news Kim Kardashian had her baby. But I noticed your Twitter account was eerily silent. Anything you want to say to her?
I don’t want to get beat up by Kanye. But she’s a friend of mine. I’m’ happy for her. I’m not a woman so I don’t know what it’s like to give birth. It’s probably cool you know? She’ll be on the cover of all the magazines in a month and we can see all the baby weight she’s lost. That’ll be exciting. I can’t wait for that.
SW: Ha that's for sure!
I think the internet is really good and really fucked at the same time. It’s allowed crazy people to have a voice and talented people get washed out. It’s almost like a riot. I’m not really feeling it. You have to go to it because that’s what happening. Or you can retire. That’s why I like playing small towns. They are stuck in the past. You guys [in Bend] are pretty savvy though. I mean you’re not Eau Claire Wisconsin.
SW: There's a video that's resurfaced of you interviewing a four year old Bruno Mars. If you were still on MTV, what would you think about getting the chance to interview Justin Beiber when he was a kid?
I’m happy for him, I think he’s talented. He fills the void of that teen audience that’s been around ever since David Cassidy. There have always been those bands, Backstreet boys, N’Sync. It’s just a genre of music that there is an audience for. I hope for his sake that he’s able to pull himself out of this marijuana haze he’s in though.
SW: You see some warning signs there?
Definitely.
SW: So, today is Father's Day and they just crowned a new Miss U.S.A.. If you were her dad what kind of advice would you give her about her new found glory?
I would give the same advice I’d give to someone else: find out what you want to do with your life when you’re 60 years old. That’s why these playmates start modeling. They want to be playmates so bad but they have nothing else. It’s kind of sad in a way. There’s nothing wrong with being a pretty girl, because you want to be, desirable. There’s nothing wrong with that, but you should have a plan B even if that is getting pregnant by a rich dude.
SW: Thanks for taking the time to talk tonight Pauly! What should people who show up at the Tower Theatre expect when you come to town?
Bio Dome 2 bro! Whooooooo! Um. I don’t know, it’s Pauly Shore so if you know who I am and you know my brand of comedy then you know what you’ll get.
Pauly Shore with Sandy Danto
8 p.m. Wednesday, June 19
The Tower Theatre
835 N.W. Wall St.
Tickets $25-$35 at www.towertheatre.org
After winning Last Comic Standing 2013, local do-everything guy Josh Cordell is taking his talents to the non-contest stage. So if you're looking for some chuckles tonight, this is the place to be.
In the opener for last night's Late Show with David Letterman, Bend was mentioned twice.
First, when Letterman joked that he was from Bend, after saying so he made a face that looks like someone just gave him a swift kick in the pants . Here's the video, quip at about 1:00.
Second, when he asked guest performer Tyler, the Creator about Bend, effectually saying, "Hey, did you get my joke at the beginning of the show?"
Fast forward to 4:55 in the video below where Letterman asks,
"Have you guys ever been to Bend, Oregon?"
Tyler responds, "Yeah, I don't even know what that is."
Tyler, the Creator is scheduled to play the Midtown Ballroom on May 10.
Featured in a Facebook Home ad and on Letterman in 24-hours, Bend is blowing up this week.
The internet is abuzz with April Fools jokes!
Every year Google attempts to out-do itself with a bigger, better, more ridiculous prank. Last year, they debut and 8-bit format for google maps. This year, they've released promotional videos for fake services including Google Nose, a smell-based search engine, and Google treasure maps, based on the long lost maps of pirate Willian 'Captain' Kidd.
Read more April Fools gags on CNN.
My personal favorite, other than Scope's bacon-flavored mouthwash which I think sounds great, is the announcement that after collecting their final entries, YouTube will be shutting down to review submissions and choose the best video on the internet.
In this video from The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, a Tea Party representative fervently defends the Constitutional rightsof Florida's citizens . . . To ride manatees?
After an "awkward" end to his comedy show, it looks like Dave Chappelle may be making a comeback.
We certainly hope so. In case you need help remembering why we all like this guy, here's an hour of Chappelle making us want to hang out with him forever. Warning: For mature audiences and note that the n word is used from time to time.
Because we love you...
Episode One
