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Monday, November 22, 2010

Four Loko Watch: Oregon Bans All Caffeinated Malt Liquors

Oregon is the fifth state to ban Four Loko and other caffeinated malt liquors.

Posted By on Mon, Nov 22, 2010 at 10:30 PM

Well, it was a wild ride while it lasted. If you were one of the folks who participated in Four Loko Friday, you got in on the malt liquor and caffeine craze just in time because this weekend the Oregon Liquor Control Commission voted to ban the sale of Four Loko and six other energized booze products in the state.

Oregon is now the fifth state in the country to ban the drink and the OLCC's announcement comes in the heels of a recommendation from the Food and Drug Administration last week indicating that the drinks pose a public health concern.

As dedicated journalists, many of our staff (accompanied by outside associates) partook in Four Loko over the weekend. In no particular order. Here are some observations.

1) Some ALL of the flavors taste like cleaning chemicals.

2) After three sips, the urge to perform karate kicks becomes overbearing.

3) After four sips, miniature earthquakes permeate through your stomach.

4) Four Loko is not a viable cold remedy.

5) Trying to sleep after imbibing a can of Four Loko is terrifying, unless you get a kick out of goblins running around in your brain.

6) The watermelon flavor is probably the most tolerable. And by tolerable, we still mean it's horrible.

7) No one should really be drinking this stuff. It hurts your brain.

 


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