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El Tigre? 

Hey there. How was your Thanksgiving weekend? Eat a lot of turkey? Get some football in? Good to hear. Oh, and by chance did you drive away from your mansion in a luxury SUV at two in the morning as your wife "courageously" chased you down the street, smashing out the windows of said SUV with a golf club until you crashed into a fire hydrant, coming to a stop in your neighbor's lawn before crawling out into the middle of the road where police found you passing in and out of consciousness? Then did you blast the media for daring to question the bizarre circumstances surrounding your low-speed, one-vehicle, non-alcohol-related crash? Yeah, neither did we. WTF, Tiger?


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