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Now, let's get one thing straight: Red Sox fans are endlessly better than Yankees fans. And, Red Sox fans have a sort of blue-collar, beer-drinking folksiness about them that's easy to like. But it's the bandwagon Red Sox fans that bought a cap when Johnny Damon and Manny Ramirez (now a Yankee and a drug user, respectively) led the magical team of 2004 to victory and now deem it necessary to root against their home team every time the Red Sox come to town.
By Left Field's estimate, about one in four Safeco Field seats were occupied by Red Sox fans - who gladly chanted "Let's go Red Sox" ad nausea, which in a visiting ballpark is the equivalent to walking over to your neighbor's home for the express purpose of taking a paint-peeling dump. There are some things you just don't do away from home.
In the end, the Mariners took two out of three games from the Red Sox - only losing the one game Left Field attended in person - but seeing all that red throughout Seattle was enough to make us want to projectile vomit on the nearest Dustin Pedroia jersey. Why can't there be bandwagon Mariners fans that pack stadiums wherever the team goes? Oh right, no one wants to wear those silly "what the future will look like when we get there" teal-and-navy uniforms, no matter how cute Ichiro might be. - Mike Bookey
