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The Freshest, Straightest Poop That Money Can't Buy 

From E. coli to crotch shots on Twitter, an update on all the news for the week.

Monday, May 30

Shook up: In wake of Japan's nuclear disaster, Germany decides not to build any more nuke plants and phase out existing ones by 2022 ... Set back: Regime of Libya's Muammar Qaddafi takes a hit as eight top generals defect and flee to Italy ... When produce goes wrong: Outbreak of E. coli linked to tainted Spanish cucumbers kills at least 14 in Germany; other European countries close their borders to the deadly vegetables ... This is gross: US Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY) accused of sending photo of his crotch to woman via Twitter, but DailyKos says analysis shows it was PhotoShopped ... This is the grossest ever: "Hangover II" becomes top-grossing comedy movie of all time, grossing more than $138 million over Memorial Day weekend. Did we mention it was really gross?

Tuesday, May 31

Big win for the right to bear rats: National Labor Relations Board rules unions have right to erect 16-foot inflatable rats outside business as protest symbol. Wow, that's a relief ... Meeting of the minds(?): Possible presidential candidate Sarah Palin and ex-presidential candidate Donald Trump get together over pizza in NYC. No word on who picked up the check ... 'Bye pyramid, hello pie: Obama administration ditches decades-old "food pyramid" in favor of "food pie" as guide to healthy eating. No, not chocolate cream pie ... Too funny to be true: Former fundamentalist pastor Ted Haggard, ousted after gay sex scandal, to have cameo role in "Christian sex comedy." We always thought that was a tautology ... Just too funny: Rep. Anthony Weiner lawyers up with view toward possible suit against whoever sent that crotch photo.

Wednesday, June 1

The war is over, the drugs won: Global Commission on Drug Policy declares war on drugs a failure, recommends treatment instead of prison for drug users ... A nasty breed of bug: World Health Organization reports E. coli that's sickened at least 1,500 in Germany is new and unusually deadly strain ... Meanwhile, Spain demands payment from Germany for falsely blaming Spanish cucumbers ... Diplomat-speak: Talks between President Obama and House Budget Committee Chair Paul Ryan on debt ceiling described as "very frank." Translation: They threw chairs at each other ... The Shaq won't be back: Basketball great Shaquille O'Neal announces on Twitter he's retiring after 19 years in the NBA ... But the Italian Stallion will: Broadway musical based on hit 1976 movie "Rocky" in the works. No word on whether Sylvester Stallone will reprise his role.

Thursday, June 2

Could we maybe get a payday loan? Moody's investment rating service threatens to downgrade United States' debt rating if deal on debt ceiling isn't reached "in coming weeks" ... Got some 'splaining to do: Goldman Sachs receives subpoena from Manhattan District Attorney's Office regarding probe of the debt crisis and its sales of mortgage-backed securities, aka "dog poop" ... Mitt's in: Former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney announces presidential bid, blasts President Obama for handling of economy, accuses him of taking ideas from Europe. Which would be a bad thing ... why? ... Octodoc busted: California Medical Board revokes license of Dr. Michael Kamrava, who helped Nadya Suleman, already mother of six, conceive octuplets in 2009; says he "did not exercise sound judgment."

Friday, June 3

Telling it like it is: Presidential candidate Mitt Romney, at town hall meeting in New Hampshire, says "I believe the world is getting warmer, and I believe that humans have contributed to that" ... Elsewhere on the campaign trail, a person unknown puts a sign saying "I, the Media Whore" on Sarah Palin's bus in NYC ... No pot for you: Oregon district attorneys and US Attorney Dwight Holton serve notice on marijuana dispensaries that they'll get busted if they sell weed. (They're only allowed to give it away) ... Final Exit: Dr. Jack Kevorkian, who helped dozens of terminally ill patients end their lives with his "suicide machine" in the 1990s, dies at 83 ... Good thing it wasn't a heart transplant: Frustrated by dispute over $25 medical bill, Jason West, 38, of Vernal, UT tries to pay it with 2,500 pennies, gets charged with "disorderly conduct."

Saturday, June 4

Blame not the cucumber: Deadly E. coli outbreak in Germany worsens; over 1,700 stricken and at least 18 dead. Meanwhile, Spain launches ad campaign to rehabilitate image of its cucumbers, falsely blamed for the epidemic ... Changing the guard: Yemeni President Ali Abdullah Saleh, injured in attack on his compound Friday, reportedly leaves country, turns over reins to Vice President Abed Rabbo Mansour Hadi ... Curses, hacked again: Sony Pictures confirms it was hacked a second time by LulzSec, group that claims it stole over a million emails and passwords ... Not quite a Rembrandt in the attic, but not bad: PBS's "Antiques Roadshow," visiting Eugene, turns up 1919 oil painting by Norman Rockwell valued at $500,000, owned by Springfield family for 90 years.

Sunday, June 5

Beware the sprouts: Officials now blaming Germany's deadly E. coli outbreak on bean sprouts; government now telling people not to eat them. Seems like a good idea ... The most unkindest cut: Support growing in Santa Monica, CA for measure to ban circumcision. Jewish groups fear assault on religious liberty ... Drive-thru flashing: Robert E. Porter, 69, of Redmond arrested for allegedly exposing himself to employees at four Bend coffee stands in the past month.

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