For the past few years, I haven't seen many Monday Night Football kickoffs, mostly because I'm one of those people who lives on the West Coast works on Mondays, but also due to the fact that for the past 20 years, these games have begun with the trite country-rock of Hank Williams Jr.
Of course, I'm referring to the "Are You Ready For Some Football?" song that Williams customizes to include the names of that week's teams, performing it amidst pyrotechnics and ostensibly sexy women who are roughly one-third his age. The song is ridiculous, as is Williams. And I've hated it from the first time I heard it at age seven.
Now, ESPN hates it too and cut the segment from this week's Colts vs. Buccaneers matchup and likely any other upcoming MNF games. Not because it's a worn-out and embarrassing-to-watch tradition, but because Williams went on television earlier that morning and acted even crazier than normal. Appearing via satellite on Fox News' "Fox and Friends," Williams first made a point to comment on the hotness of not-hot-but-crazy "Fox and Friends" co-host Gretchen Carlson, who then told Williams, "I'd love to pick your brain about politics." Keep in mind that this is a guy wearing sunglasses and a baseball cap, sitting with his arms crossed. Seems like a reliable guy to comment on a national news program, right?
As is nearly customary for guests on Fox News, Williams - speaking with what sounded like a mouthful of marbles and Double Whoppers in his mouth - went ahead and compared the President of the United States to Hitler and referred to him as "the enemy." And this was because he played golf with Speaker of the House John Boehner. Oh, and he also called Obama and Biden the "The Three Stooges." Apparently, you don't need to study math if you're the offspring of a country music legend.
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In Williams' defense, he did appear to be somewhere between drunk and quite drunk. Or maybe he always looks like that. It's hard to tell with those sunglasses and cowboy hat. Also, I only specialize in Northwestern Redneck, whereas Williams seems to be speaking some sort of Southern-Redneck/Appalachian Hillbilly hybrid that is much more difficult to understand, so I may have misunderstood him. And again, he appeared to be waking up from a long night of drinking or perhaps beginning what would end up being a long day of drinking.
Even Fox News, which for a few years devoted an hour of prime time to a man who filled most of those 60 minutes with comparisons between the president and Hitler, said that Williams' comments were out of bounds. ESPN took it another step further and kicked Williams to the curb. Hopefully forever. Not because of his politics, but rather because that song is really, amazing, mind-numbingly awful. Be as crazy as you want to be, Hank, just stop playing that damn song. To answer your question, yes, we are ready for some football. And no, we don't need to be asked that question ever again.
