I would like to publicly thank Ace Hardware for agreeing to withdraw "Stick-Em" glue traps from their shelves.
Ace Hardware readily acknowledged the inhumanity of these traps - the animals caught in the glue suffer for days before they finally die of starvation, dehydration, self-mutilation, and shock while patches of skin, fur, or feathers are torn from their bodies as they struggle to escape.
Intern
Lay off the Donkeys
I was seriously disturbed this week to see that The Source stupped (sic) so low as to let the Stars Caberet advertise such pornographic filth. The last time I checked a "live donkey show" was illegal in the USA.
Stop the Cheap Shots
In the "Best of Central Oregon" issue, I noticed a little blurb in the eponymous section reading, "Best Way to Tell Someone's a Ski Instructor: Because He Keeps Telling You He's a Ski Instructor." The author, (BL), goes on to make comparisons to rafting guides and "those bizarro dudes who smack each other in Drake Park.
Spillway Remains Deadly
On Saturday evening another person was rescued from drowning in the spillway. He was a floater with an air mattress and ended up in the middle of the river fighting to get away from the spillway.
Cruise Yourself: Seeing Bend by bike
Big wheels keep on turning. Imagine yourself as a 20-year-old college student without a care in the world, save maybe Nike's working conditions in Indonesia. You've got three months of free time before fall term and only one problem, no money.
In the post sub-prime and post-post dot.com world, what's a student to do? Pumping gas is always an option (this is Oregon after all) but there are some Karma issues and even good old unleaded is feeling the pinch as folks move to carpooling, biking, and, gasp, even walking. Restaurants have been hit hard, too. Rising food price and a downturn in customers have put the pinch on what was once a go-to industry for students.
Long time friends Peter Daucsavage and Spencer Hill started thinking early about how to turn a buck while home from school and came up with a novel idea. Brainstorming over Christmas the pair decided that they would try to cash in on Bend's summer tourism economy by offering cruiser bike tours of downtown Bend and the Old Mill. Operating with a shoestring budget the two, and a third partner Lucas Zettle, launched Bend Bike Tours. For $30 the pair offer a guided tour of the heart of Bend from Drake Park to the Bill Healy Bridge that includes fun "Did You Know" nuggets like Clark Gable once worked at the Brooks-Scanlon Mill and former Bulletin publisher George Palmer Putnam was married to Amelia Earhart.
Full Metal Junket: Stiller’s latest is predictably over the top
Jungle boogie. In the decade since he became a household name Ben Stiller has drifted primarily towards two comfortably generic personas: the tightly-wound, put-upon Everyman (see: Meet the Parents, Night at the Museum) and the preening buffoon (see: Zoolander, Starsky & Hutch). All the world loves a clown, and Stiller has been content to be one, nuance be damned.
Tropic Thunder, however, finds Stiller as star, co-writer and director attempting a skewering of Hollywood - a genre that requires a scalpel, where he favors blunt instruments. The set-up casts Stiller in buffoon mode as Tugg Speedman, an action-film star whose box-office clout is running out of steam and whose attempt at "serious actor" respectability playing mentally-challenged in Simple Jack flopped miserably. He's leading the ensemble in a Vietnam War drama titled Tropic Thunder, along with co-stars — including multi-Oscar winner Kirk Lazarus (Robert Downey, Jr.), a Method maniac who had his pigment altered to play an African-American soldier; and heroin-addicted comedy actor Jeff Portnoy (Jack Black) — who are causing just as much trouble for rookie director Damien Cockburn (Steve Coogan). So Cockburn and the movie's grizzled technical advisor (Nick Nolte) decide to drop the actors into the jungle for a more guerilla-style filming technique — where they promptly encounter real danger in the form of a well-armed drug operation.
The opening 10 minutes hold out the promise of one of the year's most hilarious comedies, including a trio of faux movie trailers introducing the preferred milieu for each of the three principal actors. Lazarus and Tobey Maguire make cow eyes at each other as closeted gay monks in Satan's Abbey; Portnoy plays multiple flatulent, fat-suited characters in a vicious swipe at Eddie Murphy. Even the early moments of over-the-top violence from the movie-within-the-movie — a bayonet-slashed private (Jay Baruchel) tries to gather his intestines, and Speedman's character goes down in a hail of Platoon-inspired gunfire — are funny in context. Give Stiller a full-length feature of cinematic parody sketches, and it'd kill.
Life in the Express Lane: Stoner action flick with a conscience
Truth is, we ran out of waterboards. The Apatow comedy train chugs along with a new installment, Pineapple Express.
You cannot get more of a skeletal plot here. Dale Denton (Seth Rogen), a 26-year-old process server with an inexplicable high school girlfriend, witnesses a murder while on the job and exits the scene leaving a roach of Pineapple Express, the ultimate killer weed. Turns out his subpoena target is the dealer that supplies his connection, Saul (James Franco). Soon they're on the run from cops, drug crime warlords, evil Asians, and whoever else crosses their path. Almost all the dialogue seemed or was ad-libbed, reminiscent of "Curb Your Enthusiasm," but lacking Larry David's Seinfeld-esque plot twists.
I have to admit there are some redeemable qualities James Franco was excellent as the weeded-out dumber-than-dirt dope dealer. As of late, Franco seems typecast to play the guy possessed with angst and inner turmoil in most of his characters (Spiderman, Annapolis) in contrast to his slacker role on Apatow's late 1990s television gem Freaks and Geeks. It was refreshing to see him in this role of weed-soaked, dim-witted, likable, grinning idiot-it was almost like getting to know Brad Pitt's character from True Romance. And Danny McBride (Fist Foot Way) as Red, the middle-man drug connection, steals the show playing part tough guy drug dealer part wimp-ass squealer.
Under the Moon Light: Spotlight on Silver Moon local’s night
Okay, so it's not technically a "Happy Hour." But when it involves discounted micro beers and goes on all night, it sure qualifies as something.
Under the Moon Light: Spotlight on Silver Moon local’s night
Okay, so it’s not technically a “Happy Hour.” But when it involves discounted micro beers and goes on all night, it sure qualifies as something.
Keeping it Casual: Scanlon’s remains on the short list
the more things change, the more they stay the same. When someone would ask me 15 years ago what Bend's best restaurant was, I would always say "Scanlon's." The food was consistently prepared with variety and creativity, but it was familiar and accessible. The atmosphere was subdued, but not stuffy, and it was the only place in town where I could get a proper Dirty Martini.
Of course, some things have changed over time like the staff and the chefs. The menu has also seen several overhauls, but the restaurant inside the Athletic Club of Bend still stands up to the stiff competition in the culinary hot spot that is Bend.
The dinner menu consists of standard ingredients prepared in inspired ways. On the appetizer menu is a hummus of white beans ($9), a Steelhead tart ($13), and Brie wrapped in walnuts. The calamari is hand cut and the pork shank has a Southwestern kick from the chipotle BBQ sauce, the cotija cheese and the crispy corn cake it is served on.
Entrees include brick oven pizzas ($14), a recently popular fine dining option that Scanlon's has been offering since it opened almost two decades ago; meal sized salads (ranging from $9-$14) that when ordered with an appetizer will not leave you hungry; and larger plates of pork, lamb, duck, steaks and seafood.

