Awakening Your Inner Hero: A moment in time, or needing to be right is wrong

I couldn’t figure out which title was the right one.

Get it?

Is there even such a thing as a moment in time?

Is there anything else except moments in time that add up to be minutes, hours, days, then generations and millennia?

We have all heard the wisdom that this moment, the Now, is the most important moment in our lives. What has already happened, we have no control over, and what shall be is speculation. Right now is when we actually have the freedom to choose. It could possibly impact the rest of our entire lives. This choice is surely influenced by our past.

But now is when life happens. Everything is now.

Hang in there, please.

Every single thing I have said so far is true!

But…(yes, there is a but.)

None of what I’ve written so far is totally true.

In one way of looking at the world, it is true, but as we all know by now, hardly anything is that simple. There are layers and layers to each and every truth. Particularly opinions which are so much of what surrounds us these days. But even the hard sciences wrestle with truth.

Keep breathing, in your abdomen, please. Through your nose works the best. We’ll be traveling together into inner and outer space for the next few minutes, possibly longer. Hold on, or perhaps letting go is even better.

Think about times in your life — some memorable ones. Intriguingly, they are still with us. Time is mysterious. Sure, we know what time it is, and how much time it takes to cook popcorn and drive to town. But a moment in time can last for lifetimes. I still hear the advice of my daddy who was the child of poor Russian immigrants. He told us, “Do what you love and the money will come.” That moment is forever imbedded inside of me, and now in our children and grandchildren. Is the now only now? Obviously not, but now is when we have power to direct and create our futures. We also have the capacity and responsibility to change the story of our past — how we view it, and how it impacts us and others.

Painful moments can last forever. However, humans have the unique healing ability to repent and also forgive. We can choose to release the shame for our regrettable deeds, and the blame we attach to others for their hurtful deeds. Hatred, resentment, shame and blame are common ways we enslave ourselves to our past. Now is the time to let them go.

Now, how does my other title, Needing to Be Right is Wrong, fit into today’s topic about the magical, mysterious powers of time?

First off, I want to thank everyone who has ever fought for a righteous cause. There are too many true heroes to mention. I am not talking about these heroes today. Today I am speaking about nearly all of us who have been hooked into the societal, cultural and family habits to reflexively disagree, need to be right, stop listening and create walls between us.

If I was the Boss and could do just one thing before I take my final leave, I would teach everyone that our all-too-common day-to-day need to be right mostly has poisonous effects on our relationships.

And it is so UNNECESSARY.

First of all, how much time do you and I have left? None of us knows the answer to that question. All we do know is that we don’t know. And most of us, at our highest self, would prefer the time we have remaining be filled with more harmony and less discord. Harmony with family members, friends, neighbors, even strangers.

Our need to be right, conflictual and distancing, has been around since the beginning. It is easy to do, culturally popular, and falsely empowering. NOW is the time for us to see that this need to be self-righteously right for what it truly is — poison!

It is time to move on, one moment at a time.

Our future depends upon our efforts today.

Blessings. …

– Burt Gershater is a counselor, leadership trainer, speaker and writer.
He can be reached at info@burtgershater.com

This article appears in Source Weekly February 2, 2023.