Like any title for an article, book or movie, there are many layers — both higher and deeper — than its literal meaning. Another equally instructive title for today’s message could be: Don’t Always Do What You Love to Do. But we’ll leave that one for another time.
Living a full life includes figuring out how to understand what initially appear to be paradoxes. In reality, each is equally true in its own context, and the context is often simply our state of mind.
When I was growing up, my dad was a sports fan. Not just a fan, but an active athlete till the day he died… which was on a tennis court when he and his doubles partner were winning 5-2. He never got up after hitting his last serve. Blessedly and thankfully, I can say I have done my best to follow in many of dad’s footsteps.
He taught me how to play tennis when I was in elementary school and took me to U.S. Open tennis tournaments many times to see the best players in world. I loved tennis, and sports of every kind: running, basketball, hiking, football, baseball, golf, badminton, rock climbing, skiing… you get the point.
Just last week, Wendy and I attended the Australian Open tennis tournament in Melbourne, Australia. Dad would be happy I am continuing our tradition.
Q: How did this come to be in my 79th year of life?
A: By doing what I have always loved to do — this is the ultimate answer.
When I began my private practice in counseling 50 years ago, I was looking for clients in my little town of Flagstaff, Arizona, so I reached out everywhere. One of those places was the athletic coaches at Northern Arizona University. Maybe I could help them do better at what I had always loved to do.
One of my earliest contacts was the cross-country and track and field coach. Flagstaff’s 7,000-foot elevation helped draw many of the best young athletes from around the world, and I might have the opportunity to work with them. It happened, just as I had dreamed! I have been blessed to work with many nationally and world-ranked athletes and teams over my career.
Fifteen years ago, I was asked by his coach to work with David McNeill, a promising young Australian long-distance runner.
The short version of the story goes like this: I helped him become better focused. The mental nuances required for running at the highest level are as critical as the physical aspects. A few years later, being his mentor and coach transitioned into just being good friends.
David won two national championships and many other awards while running at NAU. His training only increased after graduation. He subsequently competed in three Olympics for Australia, and a fourth has not been eliminated from his ever-refocusing vision.
Running at his highest level is interwoven into David’s being. Have there been challenges and potentially career-ending injuries along the way? Of course. Has he learned to listen better to his own body’s wisdom and to his healers? He has. He says that developing patience has been the biggest challenge of his competitive running career.
We, together with our families, have stayed in regular contact over the years, even with the many miles and time zones that separate us.
A few months ago, I got a call from David. “Would you come down to Australia and perform our wedding ceremony? Chloe and I are getting married in early January. We can’t think of anyone else who we’d want to do it.”
We returned last week from our trip to Melbourne. The wedding and family gatherings were the highlights. I was even able to help a few runners David coaches with their focus.
Do what you love. You will go places you never dreamed.
Blessings.
—Burt Gershater is a counselor, leadership trainer,
speaker and writer. He can be reached at
info@burtgershater.com
This article appears in The Source Weekly February 6, 2025.
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