When will cinema stop being obsessed by sex? Sex scenes these days are so predictably present, and so predictable, they may as well start slotting in audience toilet breaks – just to keep it real. Do filmmakers still collectively think we have no clue what happens when naked people rub up against each other? On-screen relationships were much more interesting when actors had to keep one foot on the bedroom floor.
Humpday is a film obsessed by sex like a toddler is obsessed with presenting what they've done in their potty. To its credit, Humpday came out of the Sundance Film Festival, and hardly any DV-made, Sundance films actually make it to theatres. Film critics tend to believe people will see Transformers despite the reviews, but a small, independent film can be helped greatly by a good quote for the posters. Sad to say no such quote will be provided in these prudish paragraphs.
Culture
Our Picks for the Week 8/28-9/3
Ween
friday 28
This deliriously odd alternative rock duo that pushes beyond parody. See this week's profile. $33. 6:30pm. Les Schwab Amphitheater, 344 SW Shevlin-Hixon
Dr. Jeremy Michael Cashman
friday 28
Tuscon, Arizona-based trio Jeremy Michael Cashman has been around since 2005, but doesn't play live very often. Because of that they've got to make it good when they do plug in. The band consists of Jeremy Michael Cashman on guitar and vocals, Davey Hendrickson on bass and saxophone and Noah Thomas on moog, theremin and trumpet. Cashman is inspired by love and relationships making for troubling and personal tunes. 8:30pm-2am. Free. Astro Lounge, 147 NW Minnesota Ave.
Crossing Over: Bend's own Dirty Snowflake Apparel makes clothes for anywhere
Editor’s Note: For more Fall Style, check out this week’s special issue.
If you're like me, you don't enjoy changing your clothes more than once a day. You want to wake up, shower off if you find it necessary, dress in the outfit you've committed to for that particular day and then bike your way to work. And you don't want to change clothes, even if you want to, for example, hit up the rock climbing gym after work.
Bend's own Dirty Snowflake Apparel has focused on the idea of “crossover clothing” with its newly unveiled line of goods. Douglas Robertson, the former owner of Bluefish Bistro, and his business partner and fiancée, Dara Robson, founded the fledgling company in January of this year. Robertson says the mission of Dirty Snowflake was to combine style with casual clothing – something that's not always easy. For example, your boss probably isn't too thrilled with your Costco sweatpants by now.
Block and Tackle: Latest Madden is a welcome change of pace
Q: So, Madden, I've got to say that I feel like I've really gotten to know you. You've been around for most of my gaming life. You're a 21-year-old franchise now. Does that mean you're graduating from keggers to legal liquor? Or is Madden 10 just a $60 beer-run to update the team rosters?
A: Football hasn't really changed in the last 21 years, except in the roster. So it's important to have a realistic football game using real-world players. And I think this year that's apparent in more than just statistics. For example, big guys are now actually bigger. They've got bigger heads, more weight. Now when Hefty Mendoza tackles Bucky Underslung – or whatever their names are – it actually looks like a big guy wiping out a little guy.
Cat Food for Thought: Sci-fi thriller is commentary on prejudice and the human condition
District 9 is much more than a sci-fi thriller. It's an engaging mockumentary infused with black humor, a scathing satire on 24-hour news, commentary on xenophobia, corporate greed and apartheid, and it's all wrapped up in a full-blown action movie.
So much work went into this movie that it's hard to believe it was made for only $30 million. At least 10 minutes of credits are given to post production special effects teams and yet the beauty of D-9 is that its high-tech soul comes across as low-tech believability.
The plot is a straightforward Stranger in a Strange Land. An alien spacecraft is marooned over Johannesburg, South Africa. After the starving aliens are rescued, a shantytown of corrugated metal shacks is constructed to house them, and over the next 28 years their population expands to 1.8 million. Segregation and cultural differences lead to increasing prejudice and violence between humans and aliens. The Predator-like creatures with spiny torsos and protruding mandibles are derogatorily referred to as “prawns” and treated as an underclass.
Too Many Cooks: Adams’ flat performance hinders otherwise solid Julie & Julia
Julie & Julia is split in half to tell the true stories of the chef and author of Mastering The Art Of French Cooking, Julia Child, and aspiring writer Julie Powell, who wrote a popular blog about cooking all the recipes in that book over one year. But the problem is – only Child's half proves worthwhile. The portion of the film following Julia Child through her first French food experience and her life in Paris is colorful and energetic, given buoyancy by Meryl Streep's pitch-perfect performance and some beautiful backdrops. The half of the film detailing the period of Julie Powell's life in which she began chronicling her duck boning and sauce-stirring adventures is uninspiring and weighed down by a whiny, obnoxious characterization of the New York blogger that Amy Adams limps through lifelessly.
Meryl Streep does a very loveable, joyous turn as the eccentric chef that many remember most well from her 1970s and 1980s television series Julie Child & Company and Dinner At Julia's. With brilliant comic timing, she makes even her most over-the-top moments endearing. It's so good a performance that some of Streep's best lines are those muttered at the edge of scenes, suggesting when the cameras stopped rolling she just carried on in character. In all honesty, Child had the sort of personality that could have been a disaster when magnified on the big screen – shrill, grating – but Streep brings an undercurrent of genuine emotion to her wild gesticulations. Julia's marriage to Paul Child, played by Stanley Tucci, is convincing, with his adoring love for her helping along our own fondness.
Talent In Bloom: 2nd Street's bubbling cast brings life to Steel Magnolias
Full disclosure, this review is based on my experience sitting through a rehearsal performance of 2nd Street Theatre's Steel Magnolias, when there was still a whole week to go before the play was set to open, where a photographer buzzed around on stage for the first half an hour of the show, chasing the actors like persistent flies at a BBQ, and there was still ongoing discussion about how to hang the set curtains. Yet based on said performance I believe the audience at the play's opening night, and every night thereafter, are in for a treat to rival any of the desserts at Truvy's beauty parlor.
Our Picks for the Week of 8/19-8/27
Moonalicefriday 21See this week's preview for more on this all-star rocking tribe of jammers and their fearless Chubby Wombat leader. $10.
Went Phishin': My surprisingly normal weekend with America's most dedicated music fans
After some 36 hours encamped on a stretch of dusty Central Washington farmland dotted by Honey Buckets, make-shift Bloody Mary bars, rented RVs and taking in about 40 songs from one of rock music's most storied live bands, here is how I'll remember the Phish shows at the Gorge Amphitheater last weekend…
Winding through the gleeful horde at the allegedly sold-out second show on Saturday night is a man seemingly in his 40s with an at-least-12-foot fishing pole protruding from a complex and clearly self-made, harness-like apparatus around his chest. Dangling from about six feet of fishing line at the end of the pole is a Homer Simpson doll adorned somehow with flashing lights and as he walks, fans both viciously and joyfully bat the doll around. Now, the doll itself isn't that strange. What's intriguing is the fact that someone would A) go through the effort of creating this thing B) somehow get it though the ostensibly rigid security at the gate and C) willfully wear this intentionally annoying and spatially impractical apparatus around for four hours.
wRite: Capture This Moment
The color of it moved something in him long forgotten. Make a list. Recite a litany. Remember…
…Where you've nothing else, construct ceremonies out of the air and breathe upon them.
– Cormac McCarthy, The Road
This whole rhapsody, better go capture this moment
And hope it don't collapse on him…
– Eminem, “Lose Yourself”
I'm walking away from my credit union toward Fred Meyer. I have just failed to be able to use one of my new credit cards to get a cash advance so I can deposit it in my son's California bank account so he can pay his rent. He can't pay his rent because he is a writer living in Los Angeles who works every day for chump change, and in America, 2009, “Writer who works every day for chump change” is a redundancy. My mind is nothing but run-on sentences, bad practice for a writer.

