Posted inOpinion

The Bizarre Breakfast Tax Break

Somehow, about six years ago somebody slipped a little loophole into the portion of the city code governing collection of Bend’s transient room (hotel/motel) tax.

Somehow, about six years ago somebody slipped a little loophole into the portion of the city code governing collection of Bend's transient room (hotel/motel) tax. The loophole might not be big enough to drive a truck through, but it could be big enough for more than $400,000 a year to leak through.

That's how much Visit Bend, the local tourism promotion agency, estimates the city could lose in revenue if it retains a bizarre $10-per-room exemption for hotels and motels that offer a complimentary breakfast to guests.
We call the exemption "bizarre" because, in the first place, it doesn't appear to exist anywhere but Bend. Deschutes County doesn't have it. The state doesn't have it. None of the cities in Oregon or even on the West Coast apparently have it.
The exemption also is bizarre because it absolutely defies logic. Its supposed purpose is to make Bend lodging "more competitive" with other places by reducing the room tax that guests must pay. But at an average per-night room rate of $102, the savings from the breakfast exemption is only 90 cents - hardly enough to persuade somebody to vacation in, say, Lincoln City instead of Bend.

Posted inOpinion

Rants, Raves and the Rapture: Michael outdies Farrah, White rights, and Bernie goes down

The author has been sent on the road to discover a lost country formerly known as America. He is reporting while moonwalking, outside Bernie Madoff’s

The author has been sent on the road to discover a lost country formerly known as America. He is reporting while moonwalking, outside Bernie Madoff's sentencing, slinging Orange Glo while buying Farrah Fawcett posters, on assignment for Or-Bust.com and The Source Weekly.

sleeps with angels.That Hair, Smile,
That Anal Cancer
I loved her. The speckled stains on my childhood bedroom ceiling are proof enough. Farrah, a name like a fast sportscar; Fawcett, the way she turned us on with the jerk of a knob. Her swimsuit poster - red, clingy, yummy – sold 12 million copies, more than even Dale Earnhardt. The pride of Corpus Christi, TX, Farrah came to our TVs with Charlie's Angels in 1976 as Jill Munroe, a seductress spying and karate-kicking each week for her unseen sugar daddy. No man could treat her right, though; The Six Million Dollar Man, Lee Majors, who Farrah married from 1973-1982 couldn't hang, and then Ryan O'Neal, from 1982-1997, was revealed as the untalented piece of poop that he is. Gone at 62, she belongs to the ages. Take a look at the models today and know why she was different: Wasted on Letterman, convincingly playing an abused and vengeful wife in The Burning Bed, and offering herself to the cameras while suffering through anal cancer (not so sexy but, somehow, still arousing with her). She is why my right wrist is unusually strong.

Posted inOpinion

The Come-From-Behind Metolius Victory

The Metolius Basin protection bill arose from the dead last week, and everybody in Oregon who cares about the irreplaceable treasure that is the Metolius

The Metolius Basin protection bill arose from the dead last week, and everybody in Oregon who cares about the irreplaceable treasure that is the Metolius River should give thanks for its resurrection.

The bill, HB 3298, designates the Metolius Basin and an adjacent three-mile buffer zone as an "Area of Critical Statewide Concern," protecting it from major development - including two destination resorts that had been proposed there.
A week ago HB 3298 was all but buried after it failed to gain the necessary majority of votes in the Oregon House. In a tactical move its supporters "put it on the table," delaying further action in the hope of switching over at least one of the five Democrats who had voted against it.
It worked. On Monday, June 22, the bill was brought to the floor again. This time Rep. Larry Galizio of Tigard changed his mind, and the measure passed by a vote of 31-28.

Posted inOpinion

Supreme Defeat The South is redeemed by court order, Iraq burns while Iran learns, and more!

The author has been sent on the road to discover a lost country formerly known as America. He is reporting from St. Charles Medical Center’s

The author has been sent on the road to discover a lost country formerly known as America. He is reporting from St. Charles Medical Center's ER, eagerly awaiting Obama's healthcare coverage, on assignment for Or-Bust.com and The Source Weekly.

Racism is Over, Yay!
being a judge is hard!In a unanimous decision, the Supreme Court narrowed but did not overturn the Voting Rights Act. Enacted under LBJ's "Great Society" (AKA "JFK is dead and you can't prove I did it!") the Voting Rights Act forced counties, cities and school districts to prove why they should be allowed to "bail out" of the law-And, surprise surprise! A small Texas water district wanted to do just that, but called the process unfair and outdated. The Supreme Court has officially disagreed, but Chief Justice John Roberts (who is on the record as a young law clerk opposing the Voting Rights Act, Democrats voting, and women breathing) narrowed Section 5 of the Act in the decision, saying that any county or district must prove it has a "clean record" for a decade before "bailing out." Interesting language from our top court, indeed; sounds more like drug court. "Things have changed in the South," said Roberts. Have they? Been to a BBQ in Alabama lately, Chief Justice, or a GOP convention? For further consideration: The sole African-American Justice, Clarence Thomas, said he would have struck down Section 5 as unconstitutional. As a result, Awbrey Butte is now free to tar and feather panhandlers, and Crook County schools will hold a book burning at dusk.

Posted inOpinion

OLCC’s Blind Eye

The Oregon Liquor Control Commission has all the outward appearance of hip, contemporary culture. You can subscribe to the agency’s Twitter feed (Here comes an

The Oregon Liquor Control Commission has all the outward appearance of hip, contemporary culture. You can subscribe to the agency's Twitter feed (Here comes an arbitrary fine, Tweet!) or its Blogspot blog where you can learn that 77 percent of Portland area businesses didn't sell to minors, or that 82 percent of Central Oregon merchants passed their client check. But don't let the web wrangling fool you, this is an agency firmly planted in the early 20th Century post-Prohibition era. Nowhere is the agency's Victorian era attitude about alcohol consumption and sales, and its even more troubling strong-arm approach to enforcing that idea, more prevalent than in Central Oregon where the agency has been handing out fines and sanctions like Tequila shots in Cabo.

Posted inOpinion

Monday Morning Quarterbacks: Global health insurance, Blagojovich stand-up and more!

Welcomes your feedback.The author has been sent on the road to discover a lost country formerly known as America. He is reporting from Tehran, wondering

Welcomes your feedback.The author has been sent on the road to discover a lost country formerly known as America. He is reporting from Tehran, wondering why everyone is so upset, on assignment for Or-Bust.com and The Source Weekly.

Bush v. Gore v. Ahmadinejad
Phones down, Internet cut, BBC's Persia TV jammed; five miles of silent protestors on Monday, followed by shots from supporters and at least seven dead; someone must have drawn a picture of Mohammed - Or stole an election. Tens of thousands had come out on Sunday to support the incumbent president of Iran, Hahmoud Ahmadinejad, who claimed 62% of the vote, even though the counting of some 40 million ballots was officially ended early. According to reports, Ahmadinejad was declared the victor after only five million ballots were officially tallied, ending reformist Mir Hossein Moussavi's bid to unseat Satan. Iran's Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei (the real President of Islamic Iran) has relented and ordered an investigation into whispers of fraud, which will result in subjugation of women, Moussavi's purely accidental death, and more calls for death to Israel.

Posted inOpinion

Liar, Liar, Bar Owner on Fire OLCC town hall turns into roast, Hollywood Hogan, Slim Jim shortage

The author has been sent on the road to discover a lost country formerly known as America. He is reporting from a city whose residents

The author has been sent on the road to discover a lost country formerly known as America. He is reporting from a city whose residents believe they have far too many rights, bikers and its mayor especially, astrippers and tattoos secondary - Not Vegas but Portland – on assignment for Or-Bust.com and The Source Weekly.

OLCC: No problems at all, except for this damn town hall meeting
The Oregon Liquor Control Commission may not have chosen the best format for its open gathering Monday afternoon with local liquor licensees, as what was billed as a "town hall" meeting quickly turned into a chance for community leaders, citizens and a sliver of Central Oregon's licensees to tee off on the OLCC and its regional manager.

Posted inOpinion

The Republicans’ Fiscal Legerdemain

The magician David Copperfield once made the Statue of Liberty disappear. Oregon’s Republican legislators claim they’ve come up with a trick that’s even neater: They

The magician David Copperfield once made the Statue of Liberty disappear. Oregon's Republican legislators claim they've come up with a trick that's even neater: They can make $3 billion appear.

Posted inOpinion

Life During Wartime: From bailout to busted at G.M., Cheney comes clean and pigs fly

The author has been sent on the road to discover a lost country formerly known as America. He is reporting from the White Salmon River,

The author has been sent on the road to discover a lost country formerly known as America. He is reporting from the White Salmon River, removing computer-tracking chips from salmonids then attaching them to squirrels to baffle scientists, on assignment for Or-Bust.com and The Source Weekly.
$30 billion for Failing
Here’s JohnnyIf you haven't heard, General Motors is now in bankruptcy, and received another $30 billion for the fine work. These additional dollars aren't even a loan, but raise the U.S.'s - Our - ownership stake in GM to 60%. Kudos! Go pick up your Hummer, Saturn or Pontiac today! GM has been creatively bankrupt for decades, and over a dozen plants have been identified for closure (adding over 20,000 in potential job losses), and 2,000+ dealerships have already been notified that GM is breaking up with them (including three in Central Oregon) = another 100,000+ un-employees. Ever optimistic, and citing Chrysler's rapid reinvention only a month into bankruptcy, President Obama offered, "Many experts said that a quick, surgical bankruptcy was impossible. They were wrong." We'll just have to take his (and GM's innumerable, inept managers') word on that one… In other news: Michigan will soon be sold to militias for training exercises, and ex-GM CEO Rick Wagoner was seen driving a Toyota Prius, smoking a Cuban cigar, looking for a tasty quiche.

Verify your email

We'll send a verification code to .

Sign up for newsletters

Get the best of The Source - Bend, Oregon directly in your email inbox.

Sending to:

Gift this article